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Friday, March 13, 2009
lost.


i realised that i did alot of shits in the past. alot of bad things. and i didnt even realised that ive hurt my friends. in the past, many shits happened around me. i lost my friends because of my stupid and fucked up habits and attitude. why? its all in the past now. ive truly regretted of what ive been and done.


last time, i used to pop pills, alcohol, drugs, shits and everything. i always get myself wasted. just because i want to pleasure myself. whats the fucking point? i realised that ive wasted my fucking life on this shits. i even lost a friend. a very good friend to me. because of me, my stupid habits, i lost my friend. he hates me of what ive done.


i should have listened to him. i should have. to stay off drugs, stay off alcohol and everything. he's always telling me the right stuffs and yet, i ignored and always think of myself. ive truly regretted of what ive done. im serious. i dont wanna lose anymore of my friends. ive changed, and im trying. no more drugs, no more alcohol. im controlling myself.


i'll do whatever it takes to help me stay of these junks, these shits. they ruined my fucking life. they ruined my friendship. i saw him yesterday, in the bus with his girlfriend. he didnt even smiled at me. i guess, my behaviour left an impact on him. he doesnt talk to me anymore. i really missed the old times pal. i now realised how ive been in the past. i hope you could see my post, read it.


this is how i feel, ive changed and im not the fahmi whom you used to know. im not that junkie anymore. im now a normal guy who wants you to be his friend again. who wants to hangout together again like last time, to go gigs together. to go shopping and laugh at people whenever they do silly stuffs. i still remember our times together. i still have those pics of ours.


im sorry dude. im sorry farza for what ive done. im sorry for being a bad friend, ive regretted and i hope that we could be friends again. im really sorry, im sincere and i mean what i say. i hope that you could forgive me and forget all the past that we've been through. im sorry friend but i missed you like hell. i promise that i'll make it up to you. see you soon man.
farza.